Taking OCD Captive

Posted: August 14, 2013 in Articles, OCD


You can find freedom from OCD! In January of 2013 I was diagnosed with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). This helped explain symptoms I had exhibited for a while that became so strong I felt maybe it was demonic and that is very possible. Most think of hand-washers or hoarders from pop-culture on TV when they think of OCD. My symptoms aren’t as obvious; intrusive inappropriate thoughts (not desires or even temptations), constant doubts on if I had done something wrong, doubting events in my past, false feelings portraying themselves as memories almost, etc. The compulsion was to confess any thought that came in my mind or to reanalyze situations for days, weeks, or months to see if I did something wrong and just missed it. I would analyze words to make sure I didn’t tell a lie and re-record voicemails over and over again.  The doubts would be so strong that I would feel strong anxiety to confess to things I know I never did or would even desire to do. I looked for reassurance from people to confirm I didn’t do certain things. These obsessions, intrusive thoughts, and compulsions began to affect my marriage, faith, and I was very confused. Sounds crazy doesn’t it? I thought so! As I studied out the symptoms it became clear I probably had OCD and that was confirmed when I was diagnosed officially with it after going to see someone. My ebook “Taking OCD Captive” contains the methods I discovered from research and practical biblical concepts necessary for victory.

Before coming back to God in July of 2011, I use to be someone who never learned from his mistakes. I was a compulsive liar, pornography/impurity addict, and would hide many of my sins from those who could help me. God delivered me from these demons as I confessed all known sins in my past (1 John 1:9) to the men God put into my life that would guide me to through the scriptures (James 5:16). As time went on I got married to the love of my life, got back into the full-time ministry, and was even recently appointed an evangelist in God’s church one of my life dreams! Although, God put my life back together and broke my bondage to habitual sin another torment came into my life immediately after my reunion with God…OCD.

1097977_10201210285355375_87842229_nMy dreams of being in the ministry with the woman I love had been given to me and here I was outside the place we were staying still newly married crying to God not understanding why I felt guilt, doubts, for things I didn’t even do but felt strong feelings I did. Someone with OCD for example might run over a pot hole while driving. They fear maybe they ran over a kid as they dwell on it. The mind races for days as they reanalyze the event. Did they actually see a kid? Didn’t the driver in the car next to them look at them funny thus maybe they saw them run over the kid!? They can even start creating memories of doing so. In some extreme cases I have heard people have actually turned themselves in for things they didn’t even do. They could even go back to check to see if they hit someone. I’m not ready to divulge all the details of how my symptoms work at this point, but it is very similar to the example above.  I wrestled with whether OCD was a physical issue or a spiritual one. I still do believe it could be a demon or demonic. Yet as I studied the scriptures I have found most things to be both physical and spiritual. OCD is physical as the part of the frontal orbital cortex of the brain that warns us of danger and deals with feelings is overactive in people with OCD. Yet the Bible says Satan and demons can put thoughts in our heads and teach us lessons (1 Timothy 4:1-2). They become sin when we listen to them. For example, Satan put the thought in David’s head to take a census and he sinned against God (1 Chronicles 21:1-3). David sinned because he attributed a false message that Satan put in his brain to himself and acted on the thought. If he would have just ignored it and focused on ruling Israel in righteousness this event never would have happened. God is sovereign and either makes things happen or allows them for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28).

To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:7-9

The scripture above helped me come to a deep conviction. God could take this OCD away from me but has allowed it for a reason. Maybe after all the years of lying and indulgence in sin and rebellion towards God these are now the consequences. He forgave me and restored me but wants me to learn some things in his love. God is saying to me if I was to put his words down, “Mike, I’ll give you your dreams you are my son whom I love, but to keep you from becoming conceited again this thorn OCD will be given to you so it will be impossible for you to hide even the things that aren’t sin! You will feel the guilt you should have felt for sinning about things that aren’t even sin or your sin! This will teach you son that I am enough for you, my grace is sufficient for you. That true power comes in boasting about your weaknesses.” In effect God allowed this in my life to humble me and teach me to be open about weaknesses. To date I have been able to overcome many of the symptoms by God’s powerful grace and this huge revelation.

Maybe you have OCD or are wrestling with issues of the mind. My ebook “Taking OCD Captive” is a handbook giving you the steps I took to rid myself of the majority of the symptoms of OCD. OCD is my prisoner now and through these principles that are summarized from my ebook, I have been able to live out my calling in the ministry. These steps and scriptures have helped me in this battle:

1) Acceptance (2 Corinthians 12:7-9)

Meditate on the above passage. It is hard at times but I see my OCD as a grace of God. It causes me to run to Him more for strength. The more you try to fight OCD thoughts the bigger they will get. If I tell you to stop thinking about a red shoe, you immediately are thinking about a red shoe! You must allow the intrusive thoughts to be there identifying that it is not you, it is your OCD/brain disorder/Satan/etc. I recommend a book called “Brain Locke” by Jeffery Schwartz that helped me with this step. Jesus teaches evil thoughts are sin (Mark 7:21). Yet with OCD the intrusive thoughts are the result of a brain disorder or demons not your own thoughts. For example, someone who with OCD may constantly have thoughts about stabbing their family members with knives (a common form of OCD) or even worse doing something sexually inappropriate to them. Their compulsions may be dwelling on the thoughts, hiding knives, or staying away from their family out of fear.  It has been shown with OCD, these thoughts are not desires of them at all, in fact they are so morally disturbed by them that these thoughts don’t bring any sort of comfort to the person with OCD. OCD uses the very things you find morally wrong against you. These people are actually some of the safest people.  So these aren’t “evil thoughts” but misfires of the brain or evil spirits. Let me be clear, sinful desires/thoughts must be confessed and repented of. OCD is unwanted thoughts/desires that plague the person. It is important for my audience to understand the difference between an intrusive thought and an evil thought. Intrusive you don’t want it to be there so you will do whatever compulsion to make it go away but the compulsion just makes the intrusive thoughts stronger. With evil thoughts you desire the things you are thinking. Homosexual thoughts for example would be evil thoughts if the person is homosexual or aroused by such thinking. Some who have OCD are straight, happily married, attracted to the opposite sex, and yet they are tormented by doubts thoughts of if they are gay. Their compulsions may take the form of checking to see if they were aroused by the same-sex and looking into bodily reactions. This is a real form of OCD I have read about. Schwarts in his book says when they come to say “It’s not me, it’s my OCD”. This will help retrain your brain to normal. Accepting the anxiety that comes with OCD and paying no attention to the thoughts lessens their power.

2) Take Every Thought Captive (2 Corinthians 10:3-6)

The Bible teaches us we can control our thoughts. Having OCD myself, this has been hard for me at times to believe but this scripture contains the key to doing so! Notice we are called to demolish arguments that set itself up against the knowledge of God!  The brain of someone with OCD uses find sounding arguments to convince them to doubt or give into a compulsion. Did you really lock the door? Are you sure? Can you really remember doing it? When these doubts come we must demolish OCD’s arguments by the knowledge of God. This means bringing truth into the situation. As baptized disciples of Jesus we are God’s children blessed with every spiritual blessing. Just accept the thoughts as being there, and focus on who God says you are. Remember, with OCD thoughts this is not “trying to push the thoughts out of your head”, they will get bigger because you are still focused on them. Taking them captive is acceptance of the thorn and remembering the knowledge of God. In time this will demolish them!

3) Engage in the Present (Philippians 3:12-15)

Matt Sullivan who is my disciple (mentor) discipled me on something that was very key in helping me overcome OCD thinking. He noticed that sometimes I was not fully engaged in what I was doing at the moment but was in another world in my head. People with OCD give too much thought to their thoughts. Listen, the bible says the heart is deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9) so you are never going to figure it out by being mega introspective. Paul says in the verse above to forget what is behind and strain towards what is ahead. I believe we do this by focusing on the mission Christ gave us and what we can do now to strain towards that. When intrusive thoughts attack or your OCD is strong; accept the thoughts, remember who you are in Christ if you’re a baptized disciple, and fully engage into what you are doing in the moment mind, soul, heart, and strength. My wife suggested I download a game on my phone that I can play when the thoughts come. Remember, you aren’t trying to stop the thoughts, just engaging in something else. You will find in time you will renew your mind (Romans 12:1-3) and the OCD will continually get weaker. Some have said that there is no cure, but we know that through God all things are possible for him who believes.


Colossians 3:1-2 (We have power to choose what we set our thoughts on)

Proverbs 16:32 KJV (Must learn to rule our thoughts, not let them rule us)

1 Chronicles 28:9 (God knows what OCD is and what is your thoughts)

James 5:16-17 (Find someone who understands OCD and you can be open with about)

My prayer is that this article will encourage someone who felt as I did last year, alone, scared, and looking for answers. I pray it will help disciples of Jesus be equipped and understand those who may have brain disorders and feel out of control of their thought life. God has transformed me and I am now grateful as this continues to bring me closer to Him. If you are interested in transforming your life the same way I did, please order my ebook today: Taking OCD Captive. To God is the glory.


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    • Tanya Bowser says:

      I have suffered with Clinical OCD for 44 yrs… I believe it is an inbalance and demonic. Everything U have said is spot on. OCD is pure torment,,,and Yes a Thorn in the flesh,, I agree.- Also When I have the “spells” of it- I notice I lean and pray to the Lord more…- Thank you for sharing this. Bless U. Always thought I was alone with this–as a child, teenager now in my 50’s..- But now I know that it very real,, and Im not “crazy”.

  1. Sheryl says:

    bless you for your honesty and testimony to the power and grace of the Lord Jesus.

    • Truth Seeker says:

      Thank you for your words! I just recently put out an eBook on OCD that I hope you will check out! See the latest blog post!

  2. Ashley says:


    I just want to say thank you so much for writing this, for sharing what God has taught you through your battle with OCD. Your prayer that it would encourage someone has been answered tonight. I have struggled with OCD for the last 3 months and while it’s an agonising struggle I am overwhelmed by God’s faithfulness as he teaches me some of the same things he has taught you through it.

    It is helpful to see the steps broken down and to have the mechanism of OCD clearly explained.

    It has been a blessing and a comfort to read your words and have the Holy Spirit bring confirmation through them.


    • Brittany says:

      yes fighting the thoughts out of your head ugh it got worse. I just deal with the left overs on trying to contract thr baf thoughts to goof thoughts ugh it’s been 5 years, I hope I get through it. I have been watching Dan mohler he teaches us to praise God and Thank Him. I am learning not to fight these ocd thoughts trying to say what God says about me and Praise Him for what He gave me. A new mind, A new creature. He is so Good He loves me.

      • musicianmh says:

        Not sure how to reply to this right now or why I got it 😁😁but I have been using music more now for my frame of reference and actually have been powering out songs slower in a more improvised way Within The Scales.

        On Sun, Jul 24, 2022 at 4:57 PM Mike Patterson Ministries < comment-reply@wordpress.com> wrote:

        Brittany commented: “yes fighting the thoughts out of your head ugh it got > worse. I just deal with the left overs on trying to contract thr baf > thoughts to goof thoughts ugh it’s been 5 years, I hope I get through it. I > have been watching Dan mohler he teaches us to praise Go” >

      • Brittany says:

        yes fighting the thoughts out of your head ugh it got worse. I just deal with the left overs on trying to counteract the bad thoughts to good thoughts ugh it’s been 5 years, I hope I get through it. I have been watching Dan mohler he teaches us to praise God and Thank Him. I am learning not to fight these ocd thoughts trying to say what God says about me and Praise Him for what He gave me. A new mind, A new creature. He is so Good He loves me.
        Update I am going to accept that I will deal with them. And then praise God their not me. I am accepted and love

  3. Dom Garofalo says:

    Great article, this will help me a lot. God bless you!

  4. Thank you for this open and honest article. It’s a wonderful help for me and I’m sure many others 🙂 God Bless!

  5. Stefan says:

    This is amazing i have suffered to in this way God is so great, most of the times, i felt alone as if it was only me but Jesus is so awesome i just dont have any words to express. These thoughts to have driven me closer to him, before coming to Christ i struggled with porn and hypocrisy, but when i developed anxiety i started to have unwanted thoughts but these drove me closer to Christ. I am still battling but God’s grace is sufficient, im learning more truth about Christ its amazing. What the enemy uses to destroy God uses to build back. My God is amazing to think that someone else has faced the very same thing i faced. i had doubts about my past too and i got really frustrated but i wont ask anyone i used my intellect and logic to prove i made something or i did something but it left me mentally exhausted.But God has stepped in countless times this is awesome we have an awesome creator. These things have allowed me to see my weakness and lol how silly i can be, but ow awesome and gracious our father in heaven is for we are more than conquerors through Christ and nothing can pluck us from his hand.

    • Brittany Odle says:

      Yesss this made me closer to Jesus if i didnt have it i dont think i would be close to Jesus.. i just wrote a post i dont know how it gets accepted

  6. Joy says:

    Thank you for this. I want to cry because I can 100% relate to this!!! I feel prisoner a lot of times to my anxiety/ocd! This has made me feel like im not crazy!

  7. Daisy says:

    Hello , everyone who might come across this article and my comment . I understand what it means to suffer with OCD . I have vivid memories of the images that the OCD would torment me . When I was a junior in high school I started noticing these thoughts . I believe it is bc I started to take my faith a little serious . I remembered begging Jesus to get rid of them and I knew I didn’t like these thoughts when out of the blue they would come it was so bad that I couldn’t look at certain things without getting an inappropriate image . I did experience God’s hand that point of my life because there were some moments when I experienced God’s grace (peace) . Many times I looked for Suicide and self pity for the answer . But I realized that God was using my OCD to draw me closer to Him . I believe that OCD is demonic . Bc the thoughts were attacking my faith . But God allowed it because He wanted me to learn from them . I still struggle with OCD . But it is not with vivid images but with bad words . I think I have become numb to the pain . Right now I just want to have Faith and love for God . It’s amazing all the answered prayers and yet I struggle with doubt . He has given me a church to be part of and I am getting baptized Sunday and that was a prayer I would long for to come to pass . He has let me graduate from high school , feel His presence , experience the gift of love from the Holy Spirit when my little sister was yelling at me and wanted me to leave and yet I was compassionate because I felt love inside of me . I believe Jesus is trying to communicate with me but I don’t how to accept Him when these bad words come in my head . He has given me all I need and yet I don’t know how to really follow Him . All I know wish that His mercy does endureth forever .

  8. Malinda says:

    i can identify totally with this. one thing confused me how u said God would have given you this to feel all the guilt you should hav felt for all the sinning you did ?? would God want us to struggle with ocd for a punishment? i hope not!

  9. runnermom says:

    thank you SO much for this. This is May 2015, and I struggle with some of the very thoughts you described. If not for the OCD thoughts, I would be so happy most days, but these discouraging battles have caused me to fear that the enemy is really after me, that I’m being sifted like Job, etc. Part of the power of OCD is in the shame and false guilt that it produces, as well as the fear of being “taken over” by the thoughts. Thanks for scriptural encouragement. I do find that when I focus NOT on the thoughts but instead of who God is and His character, the power of these thoughts is greatly diminished. It does drive me to the Lord, yet I still struggle with fear over the battle. Bless you for writing these helpful words.

  10. bryanerayner2013 says:

    Thanks man. I never looked at it through the thorn in the flesh perspective. It sounds hard to believe, but I guess if God tells us “my grace is sufficient for you” then it is.

    A wise man told me that just because God told Paul no, doesn’t mean he won’t tell us “yes”. We need to ask until God tells us Himself.

    Thanks for taking the time to write this!

  11. Eric Visser says:

    For pretty much my whole life I’ve felt this way and now I know that I’m not alone in this fight. I’m thankful to know somebody that has experienced and overcame OCD. Be blessed!

  12. taco says:

    Thank you for writing this article. You brought out too many things that helped me for me to point them out individually. I’ve been struggling with OCD for about two years I guess, but it’s really escalated in the past six months or so. It’s like I have to do tiny little things, like wash my hands three times in a row, or someone in my family will die, and it will be my fault. Just little pointless things, and if I don’t, it comes with consequences. I don’t think I’ve done anything that would need a consequence for.. I’m not perfect, but I was raised as a Christian and was a good child. The only thing I really struggled with was porn, like anyone else. And yet, everytime I pray about it, and I mean I’ve gotten down before God and cried my eyes about this several times, nothing happens. God answers other prayers, but this? This feels like eternal torment on earth.

    It makes me feel like I’m going crazy, and I’m always scared that my friends or family think I’m weird or crazy. I also used to struggle with that thinking you’re homosexual when you’re not. It sounds ridiculous but it’s real. I got to the point where I got super awkward talking to my sister and my best friend because I thought for sure they thought I was a lesbian, even though they didn’t, and I knew that I was and am 100% straight. Thank God I’m past that now, though.

    The only benefit I can see out of it is it helps inspire me to write. But other than that.. It’s torment. It has led to small anxiety attacks (I already have panic issues), and today I almost threw down a good porcelain bowl because after I set it down, I felt the need to pick it up and set it down again, or my mother, who has been sick and in pain lately, would die. On the flip side, at the exact same time, I felt like if I moved it, she would still die, and it would be all my fault. If I ignore these thoughts, I don’t face the consequences that I so anticipate but it’s still really, really scary.

    Even right now, I feel like the devil is just sitting back and laughing at me, like “You’re supposed to have faith, and yet you’re constantly worried” and “You’re scared of me, aren’t you?” But I know God is way bigger than this. Way bigger. I just wish this torment would go away.

    Anyway, thank you again for writing this. Please remember me when you pray.

    • Michael says:

      Struggled with it since I was a child. We live in a fallen world, compulsions are ways to relieve the anxiety of some baloney thought that brings fear. Compulsions worsen OCD or anxiety because you’re telling your brain the obnoxious thought has importance when it never does. It’s always anxiety producing thoughts, even disgusting or disturbing thoughts everyone has! Think Stephen King was successful from writing pleasant stories about bunnies and rainbows?

      Compulsions keep the OCD/anxiety going, you are literally telling yourself “this fear is important, I have to prove it’s not true” and get that 100% certainty. Guess what? 100% certainty doesn’t exist and never will. Heck, tomorrow, gravity could lose its force and throw the earth right into the sun! If you think about it, 99.99999% chance it will never happen…but what if that 0.00001% chance it might? See the ridiculousness of it all?

      Satan used scripture to tempt Jesus to denounce He was not the Son of God, to doubt who He was. Me thinks Jesus gets it! I believe OCD thoughts are both demonic and flesh. Demonic because we are at war with forces of darkness. Flesh because our flesh is corrupt; even Apostle Paul stated “that which I hate, I do,” referring to his flesh. I think many Christians with anxiety, OCD or any mental impairment feel the same way. “Great, I’m so afraid, guess I’m not trusting the Lord enough…” Hogwash! Jesus understood fear, He sweat blood!

      Anyone reading this suffering from OCD, you are not alone. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! Many suffer from this garbage and every person on earth has a mental impairment of some kind. There is no person out there who has a perfect mind free from torment. Here’s a challenge, invite the torment, the unpleasant or disgusting thoughts whatever. “Here they are God, this sucks, but You’re bigger. They’re not me. Stinks though Lord.” As he described above, the more you fight the thoughts, the worst and more constant they are. “Oh lucky me! Another disturbing thought! That’s awesome, yeah, sure whatever you say thought, apparently I have no control of my actions. I fear, therefore I am. You command, I obey.” Oh wait, another day the Lord has given me wasted on outlandish fears that will never happen…will the earth fly into the sun tomorrow perhaps? Never know, that 0.00001% may happen!

      My advice from a sufferer of this crap since I was a child–accept it. We have carnal minds, we live in flesh. Anyone suffering from some idea about themselves with OCD, here’s the challenge: Your intrusive thought is a tarantula crawling up your arm. Creepy? If you’re calm and let it crawl to your hand, it will crawl its way onto the floor and away from you. However, if you slap and freak out about the tarantula being on your arm, it will bite you, bring pain and even more fear.

      A few more tricks I’ve learned: ever watch a scary movie and say to yourself, “it’s just a movie!” Does that make the fear go away? Probably not. Same with unwelcome, intrusive thoughts in OCD: this isn’t real (no really?!) so the fear will go away? No, watch the movie and for me, it subside. Watch the movie again and again, without going to the ritual “it’s just a movie”, it will lose its edge and become boring. You’ll lose interest just as your mind perceives a thought to be dangerous…what the heck is a dangerous thought?! We’re not mutants in the X-Men.

      OCD compulsions to avoid:
      -Googling your fear
      -Asking for reassurance
      -Ruminating in your mind or arguing with an obnoxious thought (cancer, disease, violent, perverse, whatever)
      -Giving up on your daily life because you feel too fearful
      -Avoiding places, people, things that trigger the feared obsession

      In conclusion, I hope this helps for further questions and thank God for the man posting his article for his courage, OCD is a relatively new to the psychology world. Psychology is changing all the time. When our parents were kids, they still performed lobotomies! We live in a culture of thoughts instead of real survival. We are a “thought culture” now with our technology. Thoughts are not reality, what we do in our external world, our relationship with Christ and people is our reality.

      May the Lord richly bless any sufferers and use it for His glory. May you also find peace you have brothers and sisters battling as you are. I pray the Lord make His truth known to you and all the peace and joy which surpasses human understanding will come to you from the Helper in Jesus’ name. Amen.

  13. D simpson says:

    I am struggling in a big way right now … I found your article in an attempt to answer a question in my mind. Is it possible that Satan uses scripture against you in ocd? For example, you are feeling a compulsion to do something that may or may not be necessary. And you do your bible reading, and while doing so , that compulsion is in your mind and it seems like so much of that scripture can be brought around to confirm that you should carry it out…

  14. D. Simpson says:

    I would like to know when an answer is posted but forgot to check the email box 🙂

  15. Trecia says:

    Thank you my sister, this article helped tremendously

  16. Tee says:

    Thank you for this article. I have had intrustive thoughts for years. I am begging for help. I love God and I try to control my thoughts, but I struggle every day. I feel so alone and ashamed. Some days I wish I could go back to the day it started, so I would know what triggered it. I am so afraid to go to my pastor. Please someone tell me the next step.

    • Brittany says:

      WE ALL GOT TO USE GODS WORD. dont control it, check it, change it. REBUKE IT and use GODS WORD and just praise JESUSSS. i still deal with this oh man if i get scared of it i end up changing it and controlling it it makes it worse. I BEG YOU DO NOT BE SCARED OF THE THOUGHTS AND DONT CONTROL IT. USE GODS WORD ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!!
      ocd use Cast all your cares unto the Lord for He cares for you. ocd is an obssession thinking thinking we have to control it.
      the devil brings this to make us doubt on our idenity in CHRIST. dont let him. he brings fearrrrrrrrr he wants you to fear the thoughts and take control. JESUS ALREADY DID IT ALL. dont take the thoughts rebuke themmmm. I am trying to get out of it.

  17. CJ says:

    Thanks so much for this article. I have been struggling with this pretty badly over the past year. I only want to approach it from a spiritual perspective since I do not want to rely on something other than God as I fear I will miss out on what He wants to show me through this trial. I have spoken with my pastor and his wife and of course my husband about this, and have gleaned some great biblical information to help me. Some days I think I’m ok, what was I stressing about? But then it isn’t long before I think of a new tormenting thought/obsession that I feel the need to confess. It’s like my mind says “yeah, well he (my husband) might not be so forgiving of that one, so you better tell him. I’m sure he wasn’t thinking of something like THIS when he told you everything was fine the last time.” I guess you could say my compulsion is confessing to my husband. However, being a Christian, it’s hard for me to discern whether I should confess these things or if I’m being disobedient to God by confessing since it’s fulfilling my compulsion.

  18. Kayla says:

    I struggled with OCD when I was younger and o don’t know that it ever completely left but became very light and less intrusive to my life. I began struggling again and have been for probably the past year or longer. I deal or have delt with Many of these symptoms (not all) and cried as I saw so many of these things I struggle with ring confirmed as OCD. I too have thought maybe this was a struggle God was letting me deal with to know that I can’t handle everything on my own. I do need him. Not so much as punishment for something unless maybe pride. Im learning through this confusing time. I actually was Searching the internet after a prolonged anxious trip to shower and washing my hands. Just looking for some peace through scripture and I happened upon this and related so I read it. Thank you for posting! Keep growin in God! I’ll say a prayer for you!

  19. Hey this is awesome yeah i have been dealing with ocd for 2 years makes me feel so low. I had suicide thoughts more than i ever had when havinf this, before this none maybe in the world a little but nothing like this. I had all kinds of ocd cleaning, numbers, tapping, sexual, harm, lust now i deal with blasphemy its the worst one. But i know Jesus is fighting for me. The amazing strategy to fight this is use,Gods Precious Word. God Word has everything we go through. When i use it the intrusive thoughts loses its power but sometimes its so bad im like ugh. When i ignore it, its okay but sometimes it comes back even harder. Another strategy i do is I just write songs to Jesus praising Him thanking Him, put on Christian music. He has never ket me fail He has always haf my back. If you guys go through this do not give up. We havr a loving God who will fight this battle. Remember JESUS ALREADY won. We just claim that. Also make that verse 2 corinthians 10:4 a prayer like i cast this thought down to make it obedience to Jesus Christ. Jesus help me think pure thoughts phil 4:8. And thank Him. I habe learned when i want restoration. I first say Jesus i believe you can heal me. Than 2nd i ask Him to heal me than 3rd I praise and thank Him for healing me. Its totally faith. Also i have to warn you when you do things for Jesus you will have resistance by the evil one. Put the Armor of God on you should put that on when you get up. It does work. At the end i put this on in say in Jesus name. I hope this
    advice helps you. All glory to JESUS 🙂 So 1ST put the ARMOR OF GOD ON
    2nd When a thought comes Use Gods Word not your own words they dont work
    3rd Write a letter to Jesus or a song or a poem
    4th Praise and worship our amazing Lord Jesus
    Remember He loves you and is fighting for you. If you want to email me or call me heres my email Jesuscaresforyou777@yahoo.com and ask for my number 🙂 Jesus and i love you all. I still battle it but today is a good day also thank Jesus for the Good days also bad day. When i used to not get them i forgot about Jesus, when i got them i asked Him to help me. So i used Him and than forgot Him. Dont do what i do. Jesus doesnt deserve it. I am learnimg to praise Him in bad and good.

  20. Brittany Odle says:

    I tried posting another post before this. Did it get accepted? I deal with ocd too. Heres my life with it. I hope it helps. Thank JESUS. all the Glory goes to JESUS. Theres an introduction om the side and blogs idk like 7 differenr ones. Things i learned might be the sane thing. Jesus got me through it all. http://jesussaves777.doodlekit.com/blog

  21. Cameron says:

    I actually have the same thing not the same life but I got my thorn ocd the same way I hate sexual stuff now when god open my eyes. And I remember that everyone keeps saying I have asberger but ocd is dead spot on its exactly the same.

  22. Brittany says:

    I tried to post something why isnt it up there 😦

  23. Melisa Edge says:

    I struggle in this way also..have doubted my salvation for almost sixteen years..need help and hope..

    • Brittany says:


  24. Alice says:

    You did a wonderful job with this article! A relative is struggling with this same issue and has almost given up. I think your struggle will help many.

  25. CL CRAWFORD says:

    This is great information as I too have battling this for years. It normally comes and goes depending on whats going on in my life. Recently it has been strong due to life changes like a breakup and new relationship. I kinda backslid and now working on building a relationship with Christ. I will use your scriptures and pray to get better in jesus name. Thanks again for writing this..

  26. Dezi Lubbe says:

    Thank you for your imput about OCD

    I myself struggle with blasphemous thoughts and since it became worse I ran to God and now I have a stronger relationship with Him. I feel extremely guilty when I have a bad thought but I have learned how to rebuke it and not to dwell on it for days so satan can toment me about it over and over again.



  27. Debbie says:

    Thank you for this article! It confirms to me what I have experienced and know…God can set us free. We must take our thoughts captive and believe that His Word is teuth. This article has greatly encouraged me!

  28. Deanna Alston O'Briant says:

    I really was blessed when I read this….I to struggle with OCD and find my thoughts very distressing. Having been a Christian for 30 years and raised in a Christian school when my OCD felt like I was out of control I really questioned my faith and I felt like I didn’t know what I believed…it is a very scary feeling when you feel like you don’t know what you believe when you’re entire life you had very strong faith and had no doubts about God and how much I loved him and desired to know him more. I don’t know if you are going to read this but if you do please pray for me and that my love for God would become strong and that my faith would become stronger and that I will know without a shadow of a doubt what I have always known to be true in my heart…I have also just began to recover from depression so I think that has made the OCD worse because I wasn’t 100% recovered from that illness. Please keep me in your prayers and pray that God would strengthen my faith and help me to know what I believe and to not have any doubts.

  29. Randy says:

    Thank You! I am a Pastor who has struggled deeply the last few years with the same issues. U cleared up so muc for me! Love you brother!

  30. Brittany Odle says:

    I dealt with ocd for 3 years. I learned a lot by it. Someone told me this

    Recognize the thought if its from God

    reject if its not from God

    and replace the thought with Gods Word

    Theres nothing else you can do that will work only using GODS WORD.

    Get close to our wonderful Father God and Jesus Christ our Lord to help you. Pray and fast and trust Jesus in everything. Yes we will suffer but Jesus is with you. Trust Jesus not drugs, not drinking, not tv, not entertainment JUST JESUSSSSSSSSSSS

    I felt God made a website through me that will help you. http://jesussaves777.doodlekit.com/blog

    you can always message me jesuscaresforyou777@yahoo.com

  31. John Merrett says:

    Thank you

    I fully understand, and struggle daily.

    God bless, John

  32. CASSIE says:

    This waa a great article. I have always struggled with my thought life and OCD, intrusive thoughts and having a warped perception of God. I have learned that taking the bible for 100% truth and standing on this ,and also prayer (being obedient) has really helped this problem to lessen in my life. God is so good.

  33. hypnoflux says:


    This was super helpful, I feel like you just described what it’s been like for last 5 years living in my head. After getting saved this has intensified I decided it makes sense that I came under spiritual attack..such a relief to read this. When it comes to the scripture about Pauls Thorn, I have also identified a bit much with that struggle (both physically and mentally). Knowing God is in ultimate control is the only thing that has kept me going, as this disorder/spirit is mentally debilitating. I am glad to read this because I have been worried about some pretty awful intrusive thoughts…I mean I never expected them to disappear but preferred they took the back burner so I could think clearly again…or just be happy about something without worrying that an unpleaseant thought was eager to rob me of that joy. I am glad I found this tonight & I hope God continues to bless your life!


  34. bk says:

    hey brother . .i am glad that my intense sickness has finaly Got someone’s help . . .i’m feeling completly hopeless and anxious of my toughts against lord . .and the sounds of insult in my head against lord which i cant control . . .but i am 100% sure that this is not me……but help i need help . .it has been a spritual cancer that is killing my faith . .i don want to lose christ helpppp……..

  35. Mai Marjenhoff says:

    Your testimony showed up at such a good time, I am literally in tears. For years I thought I was possessed or something because I too have many intrusive inappropriate thoughts and other “thoughts” for the longest time ( I’m 16 years old). It wasn’t until last year I found out I had OCD. I will literally dwell on certain stituations forever and it is exhausting. I love praying to the Lord but it is so hard when all of these evil thoughts pop into my head. Even during swim practice I almost drowned myself because I had this compulsion to say a specific prayer underwater and if I didn’t say it right or if I messed up I would restart. Lately its been getting worse and it’s been tearing me apart. I’m too embarasssed to tell my pastor/ loved ones because my intrusive innapropriate thoughts are of the Lord ( I promise I do not try to it just shows up ). I cry myself to sleep almost every night because I want to be closer to God but i can’t because I can’t think straight. I wonder sometimes why I have these evil thoughts of the Lord when I am trying to draw near to Him which He wants me to do. However, after reading your testimony I realized that this is a gift and that it can be used for His glory. Since I’m having trouble praying alittle can you please pray for me . Thank you 😉

  36. D says:

    Hey Mike,
    I’ve been saved for 6 years, but interestingly enough, I have been clean of pornography for 1 year… coincidence? I don’t think so. I’ve grown a lot since this season started, but I’m getting tired and growing weary. I’m struggling with this as we speak. I’ve been dealing with this for a year now and its affecting my relationship with my 4 year old and my wife. I’m tired of living like this. I have gone to deliverance sessions multiple times with multiple ministries and no success. I wanted to ask, did you or do you take medication for your OCD? That’s my struggle, to take or not to take.. what if gets worse with meds? what if I do lose control with meds? what if I become addicted to them? what if, what if, what if. I would greatly appreciate your response to my question.
    God Bless!

    • Truth Seeker says:

      Hi D, I am sorry you are going through this struggle. I should have a book out by early next year on how I personally overcame OCD. I did not take meds and used the principles taught in Jeffery Schwartz “Brain Lock” book to overcome. I have been free of most the symptoms for years now. That book changed my life and I encourage you to pick it up. If the principles in that book don’t work, you may need meds to help out. Again, I am not a professional and can only share what helped me. I always encourage people to seek those who specialize in OCD.

  37. Henry Duggan (pleased don't publish) says:

    Henry says….
    Thanks so much for your article on OCD. I too have suffered intrusive and repetitious thoughts all my life but did not seem to have an awareness what it was till middle age. I love your Christ-centered approach to dealing with it and I love the suggestion….”It’s not me, it’s the OCD”….that I can repeat to myself when these thoughts surface.
    Thank you.

  38. Tom says:

    Hi there I have gone through a similar situation to you with a psychotic illness I have intrusive thoughts and am thinking about talking to doctor for medication etc for them do you recommend medication for them god bless tom

  39. Brittany Odle says:

    Brother what if you took a compulsion trying to get out of the bad thought. Is there still hope for me

    • Henry Duggan (pleased don't publish) says:

      Thanks so much for your Christian approach comments to OCD. I think I have struggled since childhood with it but only could put a name on it as an adult. God bless you !

  40. Karyn neal says:

    Thankyou for your help

  41. Hello. Thank you so much for being open. I can relate to what you have said and really fighting for the truth and like you said renewing my mind has been helping me to overcome these thoughts.
    Do you get really bad anxiety? If so how do you deal with it each day? And when you became a disciple did all this decrease a lot? Is it easier to deal with when you have the Holy Spirit?

    • Truth Seeker says:

      Thank you for reaching out! I don’t get really bad anxiety anymore ever since I put the principles I learned and write about in my new ebook into practice.

  42. Brooke Parker says:

    Mike! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you I’m sitting here sobbing with my 16 year old daughter who was diagnosed in December. It’s been a horribly tough year with a kid that’s gone from a free spirit to a horribly conflicted. Then we read THIS! This is her TO A T!!!!
    The instant freedom she felt after reading this is something only the spirit can give! Thank you for sharing your struggle to bless others!

    • Truth Seeker says:

      I’m so glad it was a blessing! If she was blessed by the article that much, you definitely should purchase the new eBook I just put out on my journey and how I overcame OCD. See the latest blog post to get it.

  43. Benjamin Patalinghug says:

    I’m on my 5th month of OCD. We totally have the same issues. just wanna know how long it took you?

    • Truth Seeker says:

      It took me about probably around 5 focused months. I chronicle my journey in my latest ebook that just came out today. See the latest blog post to purchase one.

  44. claudfs says:

    Hi Mate, been 5 years since this article, any updates..?

  45. Solomon david says:

    Hi Mike,

    I’m new to this forum but had read your post a few times on your struggle with OCD. I was curious about one thing you said ( mainly to see if it applies to me), although this also may be a compulsion – to keep asking for reassurance to know I’m not what I think I am ).

    The thing I was curious about was; you mentioned you returned to the Lord again in 2011. We’re you saved ( came to know Jesus, baptized, received the spirit etc ) prior to this ” came back in 2011″ state?

    I ask only cause my own life feels somewhat like this but Im not sure. I have been in a state of back and forth struggles with addictions for a long time. Pornography, alcohol, drugs, etc…i clean up for a little, come back, walk away, come back. it happened a few times since I was baptized in like “03/”04. I also feel like I was someone who ” never leaned my lesson” and that I just kept wanting the worldly life ( mainly cause of insecurities w girls etc, and not having what I saw other guys/ friends getting in the world ) Now i feel condemnation on a daily basis, not so much for the actual sins I give into, but for this desire for wordly things ( that I’m sure everyone is tempted with ). 20/25 yrs later after believing I was saved – I still feel like i want these things. I’m 40 now. I know the worldly things dont give us joy, both from knowledge as well as my own experiences, but I found myself constantly going back to these things and wanting them. All of which has led me to question my salvation.

    My actual story is as follows ( I’ll try to keep it conscise):

    Prior to coming to know Christ personally, I grew up in a Methodist Church, learned abt the God of the Bible and Jesus. My mom was always very devout, I attended Sunday school etc..had a love for God and the stories of the bible and would memorize verses etc. I went to a private christian school but started rebelling at around 5th grade ish. Wasn’t very bright, felt constant pressure from my dad who was very conditional w his love and also very strict ( wanted me to go pro tennis and started training very early ) I grew up angry at his strictness and felt hurt by the verbal and physical abuse he sometimes put on me and my sisters..he wasn’t necessarily cruel and violent but he believed it was true discipline. I grew up w alot of fear and anger towards him soon. My mom was very loving.

    In middle and high school ( public school now )I started going with whatever the kids were doing and quickly turned to cigarettes, drinking and marijuana. Kept this up for years to come and along came alot of issues and pain and remorse and trying to find a purpose etc…in my early 20s it got a little worse. Harder drugs, turning to prostitutes etc, trying to find fullfillment however I can. Between 17 and maybe 22 another issue arose.

    From a spiritual life walk angle: somewhere around 17/18 I was studying abroad ( cause around the age of 16 my dad sent me to India – which is my ethnicity – although I was born and raised here in NJ ) cause I was getting into too much trouble here. ( He thought India might give some discipline. I decided to go along w it. ). But around 17ish, I started really reading alot of Psalms /proverbs cause I felt like my life was just going down the wrong path. I was still partying and drinking in India. Once I felt like I was going down the wrong path I started seeking God again. I finally found a church that my sister attended that was different from the Methodist Church i grew up in. Non denominational and all abt the Bible, I felt I found the truth, and they taught me more about salvation than what I grew up knowing and truly knowing Christ and getting baptized felt so real…it was a point in my life where I felt like I really had God. These days now I sometimes wonder though if I was really saved then though because looking back now….i feel as if I made salvation more about the actions of getting baptized and confessing my sins rather than accepting that it was Jesus sacrifice that saved me. I came to realize later that it was only because of Jesus sacrifice on the cross that we r saved but this didn’t hit me till a few years after leaving that church. I attended the church for a while and had a great team of people helping me w addiction recovery etc…this lasted for abt 2 yrs but I started having alot of weird thoughts, dark thoughts and scary thoughts that I couldn’t control. Things that made me seek alot of professional psychological help. These thoughts had also started to become obsessions and I kept giving into compulsions to talk abt em w my therapist etc…but this part of my life and the weird thoughts is a discussion for another time.

    Around this time with the church I still wrestled w addiction. After a while of going back and forth I felt like I had to be restored because I ” fell away” (which back then I thought was a backslidden state…which know I know is not the meaning of the Hebrews verse now – again a discussion for another time ). I kept trying to find my way back but kept turning to drugs and eventually stopped attending the church. But then something serious in my life happened that gave me another wake up call around 22. It cause me to give up my life of drugs and alcohol for abt 11 -12 yrs..I still drank occasionally but never felt I had a real issue w drinking the way I did w weed.

    I attended a few addiction groups again here and there in that 10 – 12 yr period but never really went to a specific church. Just focused on reading the Bible, working trying to find a life, a wife and happiness. I had believed I still had God with me but meanwhile I never really felt like I gave up my desire for the world, i started justifying my choices of being half in the world by scriptures like : ” i am free to do all things but won’t be mastered by anything”. A close friend remained from the church i went to so I felt like he was my lifeline to God to talk abt stuff and to confess my sins to with my pornography struggle which continued even though the drugs didn’t. He and I also had another personal issue w the church too that I won’t bring up here.

    Now fast forward to abt 2013. 10 yrs later The addictions came back w a vengeance. All it took was one bday party for a friend and I started the smoking marijuana again and I was hooked for the next 2 years but taking a break here and there when the health aspects started putting me in the hospital etc. when I started all this again I kept praying for God to show me if he was still w me. Felt like lost my salvation during that period. I came back to reading the Bible for a while and felt he was telling me to come back to him and quit everything again. I was still searching for himq nd hopes that I would be free from this life of torment. But I was also scared I would return to this life being that I did once before – but was hoping that this time would be the end. but a year later I went back to living a sinful lifestyle all over again, drugs strip clubs, prostitutes all over again because of my worldy desires. Now in my mid 30s. And it confirmed my fears that I wouldn’t be faithful ( but I felt evil for thinking God wasn’t faithful to me ). It was at this point I started really experiencing a faith issue. ” Will those promises abt keeping me faithful be met” ? will those promises in Isaiah 54 about ” oh afflicted city lashed w storms, i will rebuild you” be real?…I started feeling faithless because through the pain of my addictions and wrestling w lies of Satan and thoughts that troubled me I held on to those verses and words for years but now it was starting to crumble….I found myself wondering if they were going to be true. Alot of what Im wrestling now is, but I am not sure of , is “was my belief in God only superficial because he was going to give me things that I thought were his promises”?. Example: he said in Isaiah ” I will pour out my blessing on your sons and daughters”. During these periods of addictions I thought he was going to clean me up, put me on a faithful path and maybe bless me w a wife a career a stable income and a better spiritual life. Was I misreading those promises? Or was I I only faithful cause I wanted those things and now my faith is crumbling? Is that statement that I just said a condemnation from Satan and it’s not wrong to expect promises? I’ve started to get really confused.

    Another thing that happened is real horror stuck me in my thought life and I know I am a very analytical thinker but to a paralyzing and overly introspective point that is not good for me: as I was trying to live righteously and stop all the sins, I still kept falling into things here and there but I started getting confused w other intrusive thoughts as well as thoughts that I’m not sure we’re from he enemy or not. It got me confused to the point where sometime I felt tired battling lies or trying to figure out if they were lies from Satan or truth from God and then I would just sin..then I felt like ” I gave up trusting God” by sinning so now I “deserve to be in a place of confusion and not know if I’m saved cause I just keeping tossing my faith aside”. These are other OCD thoughts and satanic oppression that im.struggling w. Again, a more in depth conversation for another time perhaps w counselors etc…

    So bottom line is t felt like I walked away from God 2 /3 times in my life and still wrestle w confusion and lack of faith and other sins. Now things have gotten really confusing cause I keep turning to a few of those sins cause I’m getting tires of not knowing which thoughts are lies from Satan, or if I’m truly not saved now cause I keep having thoughts like ” you always wanted the world, so u don’t deserve faith in Christ – therefore your punishment is this confusion”. I don’t know if this is reality. That maybe I am already condemned and I fallen into a hell because i kept choosing worldy pleasure even in times when I knew better. I keep having thoughts like ” your too far gone” and the long that thought has been in my head the more true it seems to the point where now it really feels like I’m too far gone into believing the lie that ” I’m too far gone” if that makes any sense….then I start giving into compulsions like praying for a sign…” God if I’m not too far gone let the time on this txt msg on my phonethat blindly scroll to and that point to have a 2 in the last digit ( i.e. 3:42 pm ) and then doing it. And I’ve been tromwnting myself doing this for months.

    I’m sorry I know I jumped to many different things and made this really long so let me get back to my original question:

    This is what I’m getting with wondering how your “coming back to God” experience was. Was it like that ?- where your life was one way prior to knowing god then you found God but then again walked away and again returned?

    I haven’t really touched so much on the OCD aspect of my life but maybe we could talk about that one day. Sorry for the long post. Any help would be great.

    • Truth Seeker says:

      Hi Solomon! Sorry it took me so long to get back to you, and thank you for sharing your journey and heart so openly. OCD deals with intrusive thoughts we can’t control. Thoughts are simply just thoughts, no need to ascribe value to them. The sin on the other hand is what you desire to do (James 1- desire leads to sin). Intrusive thoughts disgust or torment us whereas sin is something we desire to do. Sin always brings confusion and only by repenting can we find clarity (John 8:31-32). Jesus said in John 5 “stop sinning or something worse may happen”. I do believe we are responsible for our actions, thus why the Bible says we will be judged by our deeds. Our deeds are a reflection of our true heart. Thoughts on the other hand can be intrusive (from OCD or Satan) or our own (which will usually show up in our deeds). My ebook I just put out can be purchased at the top of this page, the proceeds go to mission work we do currently. I think it would really help you. Also, it sounds like the church that really held you accountable and taught you about baptism in the salvation process was teaching you the right thing. If you are in New Jersey, I am an evangelist in the New York International Christian Church, and we have a New Jersey region that meets if you are near by. Email me for details mike.patterson@usd21.org. .

  46. Mary saba says:

    my cousin he has OCD and depression and his mom wants us to invade his life and to be around him always so we really don’t know what to do

  47. musicianmh says:

    This helped me as well. An article by John Piper that says Paul meant the world views we are to take captive not “our own thoughts”.

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